Although it’s been well over a decade since the last sugar-crazed child was seen yanking cheap candy from the pink hoop skirt of the Lollypop Lady, we can still wax nostalgic about our favorite pagan amusement park. While candy canes, Christmas carols, and jingling sleigh bells in June would seem just plain wrong anyplace else, somehow Santa’s Village manage to bend reality in its favor, and here, it all made perfect sense. Cookie-eating reindeer, piano-laying ducks, and a pumpkin-headed man keeping company with flying dragons, anabolic bumble bees, and roaming peacocks sure beat the hell out of some stale old midnight mass. Although SV threw a benevolent bone to those who still wished to believe that Christ was born on December 25th with their perfunctory and least-visited attraction (a nondenominational chapel), Christmas at Santa’s Village was just as it should be: a truly secular affair. This is where hot chocolate, marshmallows, gingerbread, and kettle corn were  the four major food groups, and where a tawdry, story-book themed landscape dotted with psychedelic mushrooms administered one cheap thrill after another, until—much like the Christmas holiday itself—visitors just couldn’t take  anymore.

The Santa’s Village in Skyforest near Arrowhead was the last operating of the three original (the other two were in Santa Cruz, CA, and Dundee, IL). There are still a few other Santa-themed amusement parks around the country delivering an off-season Christmas to those willing to pay admission, but none of them quite manage to nail the magic equation of Santa’s Village. And although we still prefer Christmas in June, we’d like to close with a rare item from the L.A. Bizarro treasure trunk of worthless ephemera: a Santa’s Village oversized puzzle postcard (in the original cellophane no less): our Christmas card to you.

Best Wishes for a Bizarro Holiday!

Don’t miss your one and only opportunity to nab the city’s best stocking-stuffers and sundry arcane Chicken Boy tschockes at Future Studio’s Second Saturday in Highland Park!

Future Studio, of course, is home to The Statue of Liberty of Los Angeles—Chicken Boy—and the Chicken Boy Souvenir Stand (as featured in the new edition of L.A. Bizarro, which, by the way, also makes for great holiday gifting; see button at right).

Future Studio Gallery will also be hosting “Soft,” a show of artist’s soft toys and sculptures which are, according to Future Studio matriarch and Chicken Boy’s mom, Amy Inouye, “priced to move!”

The event happens Saturday, December 11 from 7-10PM (if your dance card’s full, you can nab the wares via the interweb on the Chicken Boy Shop website). But whether you just want to check out Future Studio’s inimitable digs or simply marvel at the majesty that is Chicken Boy, just try to leave without purchasing at least one floaty pen or coffee mug. Just try, we dare you.